My father really was
two people. One was the man who took pride in everything we did. The other had
black fire steaming through his veins, his life dreams scattered like
frightened crows. Alcohol had erased these dreams: It had also enslaved him.
is the fellow who has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He
does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr. Jekyll
and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less
insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but
little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for
a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously
anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong
moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement
kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything
except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He
often possesses special abilities, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising
career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his
family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a
senseless series of sprees.
Book pg. 21
do not let my dreams become scattered like frightened crows.